Paris Je T’aime, My Wife is a Gangster 3, The Messengers

Saw these three recently…no spoilers. From now on, I’m including link to trailers.

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Paris Je T’aime

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Had to see this because of the many fine talents behind this
compilation film.  Basically it is 18 different love stories set in
Paris directed by 18 different directors.  Bottom line:  If Tom
Twyker’s is a 10, (which it is) then all the others are 1’s or lower.
Tom Twyker’s is so fucking good that it’s worth the admission alone.

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There are some, such as “Bend It Like Beckham” Gurinder Chadha, that
plays like an after-school special.  Wes Craven’s defines mediocrity.
You guys might be interested in Vincenzo Natali’s.  This is the guy
who made “Cube.”  Vampires in France with Elijah Wood.  Christopher Doyle, famed cinematogrpaher of Kar Wai Wong’s stuff, etc, etc,… is a tribute to his own Asian woman fetish. It blows. Gus Van Sant’s is gay… both definitions. OH!! almost forgot… Alfonso Cuarón thinks he’s now the master of the one-shot. It sucks moose cock.

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But again..Tom Twyker’s is amazing.  I sat there thinking… “my god,
this is why I still have faith in cinema.”  It has the single most
important ingredient in filmmaking…HEART.

trailer – http://youtube.com/watch?v=iH-WQ_THij0
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My Wife is a Gangster 3

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I haven’t even seen 1 & 2… however I hear this is only a sequel in
name and I must see everything that Shu-Qi is in because… mark my
words…one day I’ll work with her.

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So basically, this is a slightly amusing action comedy without much
action and questionable comedy.  The first two films were huge
box-office in Korea…. for this film, they replaced the lead with
Shu-Qi, who is Taiwanese.  Aryoung (Shu-Qi) is sent away from her
homeland of Hong Kong by her father, a mob boss, to protect her..there
she has to fight other mob people..including a female one.
Whoopdeedoo.

So basically she plays fish out of water and hardly opens her mouth
the entire film.  But she looks great and carries the film.  The
others should also be mentioned for good comic timing.  I’m ready to
chuck this DVD out the window… if any of you are interested…lemme
know.  BTW, the first film was the first Korean film to be sold to
Hollywood for a remake.  The remake is being produced by and starring
Queen Latifah.  First, the French blockbuster “Taxi”…now this.  At
least she knows her foreign cinema.

trailer – http://youtube.com/watch?v=OqrYmVzdECA
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The Messengers

OH MY GOD!!!!  I’m a fucking masochist!!!  Once again…I subjected
myself to more Pang Brothers bullshit!!!  I’ve reviewed “Re-Cycle” and
a couple of “The Eye” films on EG.  Again and again, they have wasted
my time with their nonsense.  BUT AT LEAST THOSE FILMS LOOK GOOD!!!
This is so incredibly boring.  And it’s PG-13, so it’s one of those
horror films made for pre-teens.  Raimi and Tabert produced this and
supposedly Eduardo Rodriguez (Curandero) did re shoots… my take is
that the studio was very unhappy with the Pangs’ work.  Hell, I am.
IT SUCKS!!! Oh yeah…and who are the messengers?…. the title makes no sense.

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I won’t even include the trailer on this review. Fuck ’em.

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No Responses to “Paris Je T’aime, My Wife is a Gangster 3, The Messengers”

  1. Cybergosh says:

    Great pic at the end!  Agree about Tykwer!  You didn’t mention the Coen Bros’ or Payne’s segments..whatya think?  Me like.  And c’mon – i liked how the Craven one ended…it was light but sweet…kinda of like sean-pan’s seed!

  2. bake snaker says:

    Oh… yeah..those were good…. I was being too hard by saying that the others deserve to be 1’s because Payne’s especially is very good.  And Coen’s made me laugh.

  3. Cybergosh says:

    I thought Doyle’s Asian Themed one would be Bake’s Fave!!

  4. Cybergosh says:

    Hey – speaking of Tykwer – is PERFUME on DVD yet?!  That really was THE MOST underrated film of 2006.  The more i think back to it the more i feel i should have rated it even higher on my list last year.  Top 10…maybe even top 5….

    such an amazing oddity…best ending ever in a movie ever ever….gotta get that dvd!!

  5. junky says:

    Sean always has and always will love cinema more faithfully than most of us, who tend to give their hearts to other media.  I have no doubt that you WILL tie one on with that Taiwanese.  And nice to see some shout out for heart.  It gets a bad name far too often, because so often it is misused, abused, and force-fed to us.

    So much so that often it seems like heart is rejected in favor of a slashing edge.  But one needs the other – no matter what your medium or genre.  Hear Hear!

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