Will ‘Pirates 4’ Be Any Better Than The First 3 ?

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…Errr… I guess the answer is… “not really”… ?

Main Probs:

-Not only is Penelope Cruz no Keira Knightley, she comes off terribly offputting, no? When she says “Steady as she goes” it sends a negative chill down my spine. A reverse chill – the opposite feeling of awesome. I kinda feel like I don’t wanna watch this movie because of this character. If she comes off this grating in two and a half minutes how are we going to handle two and a half hours?

-Ted Eliott and Terry Rosio do not know how to write a coherent screenplay. They should not have been part of this. The franchise needed fresh voices.

-The “zombies” are not cool at all.

-The Mermaids look nice but are just hot girls in water? Nothing creative about them.

-Blackbeard. THIS is “the pirate that all pirates fear” ? He sorta just looks like an old asshole, not really that scary at all. He’s got nothin’ on Davey Jones. Or even Barbossa in the first one for that matter. Or even Stagnetti.

-Rob Marshall seems to be cloning Verbinski instead of coming in and reinventing the franchise like Cauron did with Potter in Year 3.