What if you could bone Saavik?

I need YOUR help!

So some of you know that I’m writing a novel. Some of you don’t even really know who I am. Either way, I would very much appreciate your help.

In my novel, a guy is having a terrible getting over a break-up. He finds himself hooking up with a new girl as he’s going through this awful time, and the girl looks just like Kirstie Alley’s Saavik from Star Trek II. He goes on specifically about how it’s Kirstie Alley, not the dog-faced chick who replaced her in Star Trek III and IV.

The novel has fun little lists and stuff inbetween chapters, and the list after this chapter is going to be “Things my friends said when they found out I failed to bone a chick who looked just like Saavik.” It could be “you ejected your warp core” or it could be “you have to turn in your man card” or anything inbetween.

Only caveat is that I’m likely to use your suggestion and extremely unlikely to give you any credit for it other than my heartfelt thanks.